When in Rome

Several exciting new developments since the last time we met, but first:

"Jessica Offends the Train Station; Words are Exchanged"

On my way home from a 10 hour day at the AIB, I got on what I wholeheartedly believed to be the 16 bus, which every other day promises to bring me home to good ol' Tannenbusch Mitte. Not today. Though I firmly defend my vision and maintain that I stepped foot on the 16 and it simply changed en route, it does not change the fact that about 5 minutes into my normally peaceful ride, I noticed two things:
1) I was alone on the train
2)An irritated German was shouting an announcement over the PA that I had no way of interpreting.

Eventually, we started to turn in a squiggly pattern and fly by familiar signs toward wholly untranslateable ones (later, I would find out that these were not street names, but in fact German for "Silly American, get off our train") and eventually to a complete stop. A woman that I recognized from the train a few days ago approached me snapping gum and speaking in German, slightly amused that I was the idiot (idioten) still on the quite ostensibly stationary train. I squeaked that I didn't speak any German (twice), which only caused her rapid Deutsch to quicken and her arm motions become more violent. Eventually, with a curt "get! uff!" I was exiled to the main station, where trains go when they tire of humans, evidently. I wandered out of the gate, where I ran into a group of seemingly friendly Middle Eastern men, one of whom spoke sweet, beautiful English. He directed me back to the train station, where I stumbled, terrified and giddy with embarrassed laughter. Looking frantically at the schedules and not seeng a train coming for another hour, I broke down and called Hans.

He had no idea what I was talking about. Even the Germans don't understand their trains.

The same woman approached me, laughing at my silly yellow hat and fluffy down coat as I tried in vain to describe where I was. Eventually, through her tears and gasps of laughter, she got on the phone and began the indescipherable chatter with Hans that would lead me to follow her to the train and have a most amusing conversation where neither party spoke the other's language but understood her perfectly. It was a lovely moment for humanity.

Finally, we rode the train together a few stops until she finally bid me a good-natured Tschus, and I walked home thinking about how I would tell the story to Hans and Lilo so that we could all enjoy it as thoroughly as that lady had.

In other news, I booked my flight to Rome in two weeks for less than 50 euros, and learned how to say "Fuck you" in Deutsch. Fell in love with my history professor, desperately wished for a camera, and finally started to feel it getting warmer here in Bonn. Tomorrow we go to the German History Museum and next week I trick Ture, our director, into taking us to a chocolate factory in Cologne (Koln). Operation: Sweet Treats has commenced...

Miss you, love you, Auf Wiedersehen.

PS
"Das Boot" does not mean "The Boot," it actually means "The Boat." "Das Stiefel" means "The Boot," which I think is way better. I open the forum for argument.